Why Does My Childhood Matter in My Relationship Now?

Because your nervous system doesn’t know it’s 2025.
Your partner walks out of the room mid-convo and suddenly your chest is tight and you feel six years old again. That’s not an overreaction—it’s a relational time warp.

We carry our earliest attachment templates into adult intimacy.
If you had to manage unpredictable caregivers by people-pleasing, disappearing, or fighting for scraps of attention, those same protective moves probably show up when you feel vulnerable now. We don’t do this because we’re broken. We do it because it worked once—and our brains are nothing if not loyal.

The hard truth? These patterns protect us... but they also keep us alone.
You can’t heal what you pretend isn’t there. Therapy helps you see those inherited responses, understand them, and choose something different—even if that choice feels risky.

So yes, your childhood matters. But it’s not your destiny.